Post Bronch

Well, the bronchoscopy is over.

that god for ipods

Waiting for the bronchoscopy

We got to the hospital right on time-ish.  We were expecting a long wait before the procedure, like when he had his tonsils out, but we were not even done admission before they were calling us down, which was awesome.  Speedy.

We really wanted Brad to be able to take Ozzie into the OR, something we’ve asked for in the past but have been told no.  Actually what we were told in the past was: “We’re not really set up for that.” which, at the time i took at face value, but each experience with the health system makes me smarter…. and now i ask… set up for WHAT?

So.  This time, we went in armed with health region policies, but when the anesthesiologist asked if we had any questions, and we said we’d like to take him in – and she said: Sure, we’ll suit you up and you can take him in, but you have to leave when we tell you to.


i really can’t believe that this go-round it was that simple.
So, Brad suited up and walked him in and was there until Ozzie fell asleep.

The procedure took about an hour, and when he was done his respirologist Dr. Adamko came to tell how it went and show us some photos he took of the inside of his lungs.

Essentially his lungs look good.  AWESOME.

He did a flush and took a sample to grow some cultures to look for super bugs, he said we’d have the results in a few days.

We were then sent upstairs for 3 days of IV antibiotics.

finitoIt was frustrating to be there, just for antibiotics.  We asked to go home on the first day, and were told we needed to stay.  Ozzie needed oxygen as well, so we stayed.  The next day they did an xray of his chest because they thought he sounded rattly.  The xray was clear.  we asked to go home, and were told we needed to stay…

The results from the rinse came back clear, no super bugs.  On Saturday, we were FINALLY sent home, much to our collective relief.  Ozzie does not enjoy hospitals, and who can blame him, but it’s getting to the point that anyone – nurse, or doctor, or cleaning staff, would come near his crib and he was start crying, which produces more saliva, which he has trouble with, which makes him rattly, – never ending cycle! So, home to his own bed made everyone happy.

Beads of Courage

before we left, though, Ozzie got his Beads from Beads of Courage.  3 days in the hospital and 29 beads later.  He’s a freakin’ trouper, that boy.

Going forward, there’s not much of a plan, except to continue with his asthma medication and see his respirologist for a follow up in a few months.  So, until then – we are happy and healthy at home… knock on wood. 😀

Bronchoscopy day

Tomorrow Ozzie is going in for his bronchoscopy, finally. It’s been reschedule twice before, due to illness.  we’re looking forward to having the procedure done, and to have the doctors to a saline wash of his lungs to make sure there’s no nasty bugs living in there.

I’m not looking forward to what tomorrow will bring, in terms of getting up and getting to the hospital, all the while trying to sooth Ozzie as he is fasting as of midnight tonight.

it will not be pretty.

wish us luck.

The end of an era

Well, as of today i am a full time stay at home mom.

i gave my notice last week, and my last day was today.  It was a hard decision to make, but Brad and really thought about it, and in the end we decided that work was a stressor that we could do without in our lives.

So, now my only job is homemaker… which, we all know is really: mother, teacher, house keeper, launderer, childcare, chauffeur, cook, referee, disciplinarian, cuddler, baker, therapist, bum-changer, cheerleader, time out giver, and much more.

i hope i’m up for the task, especially getting back on target with Ozzie’s therapies.  They certainly took a back seat these past few months, with work – and also it’s been a really AWFUL winter for illness at our house.

I know that technically spring starts this week, but the 8 foot snow pile in my front yard tells me differently… can’t wait to get these kids outside…

Post eye appointment…

Ok, clearly i should stop blogging from my phone, because the typos are too hilarious.  My sister in law texted me and asked if i was really tired or angry when i posted the last post… because it was ridiculous.

LOL ah well, live and learn.

So, eventually we got to see Ozzie’s eye doctor. Thankfully, he wasn’t too grumpy and he did really well.  I think it helped a lot that Brad was there.  He’s such a daddy’s boy.

There is still no immediate plan for surgery, but she did tell us that she was going to Boston at the end of the month to attend and Opthamological Conference at Boston Children’s hospital, where she made an appointment to sit down with Dr. David Hunter (Opthalmologist-in-Chief and Richard M. Robb Chair, Children’s Hospital Boston, Professor and Vice Chair of Opthalmology, Harvard Medical School) to discuss Ozzie’s case and compare notes and come up with a surgical/treatment plan to correct Ozzie’s strabismus.

*I just want to reiterate that they will not be able to correct the movement of his eyes so he can look from side to side, they will just straighten them.

For now, though, the course of action is to continue to lubricate his eyes with drops during the day and gels through the night.

Oh, and for the record, our appointment was at 11, and we left at 1:30… 😦

Blah!! Eye doctors

Thank god for iPods.

I just want to go on record saying that this pediatric opthalmologist office is THE WORST!

Nothing like waiting hours to see the doctor.

While having his vision examined the technician mentioned she thought they would be dilating Ozzie’s pupils today. Uhm. What? No. When this happens you are pretty much stuck at the doctor all day. It takes 30 minutes for the eyes to fully dilate. No. We have not planned our day for this. I was not impressed.

So next time I guess.

I’m just venting. Cuz I’m annoyed.

Our time is valuable too, y’know.
Brad is of work to be here. Maybe we should charge them for his time.

these days

This has been a terrible winter.

it seems like we’ve been sick at our house since December, without much of a break in between bouts it’s easy to be all like: “WHAT THE HELL!?”


My little hipster Ozzie (these are play glasses)

I feel like i’m at the point where i can handle kids being sick better than before, and that’s really great.  What i’m not so good at handling is the stress that accompanies all those illnesses.  Since December Brad and i have taken turns calling in sick to watch the kids.  several times Brad has gone to work in the evening after i get home from work and then we don’t see much of each other.

Ozzie was scheduled for a bronchoscopy at the end of January, but it had to be rescheduled because Ozzie was too sick to proceed.  A Bronchoscopy is where they insert a camera into the lungs to look around.

Progress wise, it seems that ozzie has gone backwards – he was standing up regularly and even trying to walk… he took his first steps on New Year’s Day.  But now he has no interest in trying to stand or walk.

As far as speech goes, he is learning new signs and words every day.  He still will not make an “eee” sound, or an “ih” sound, instead he closes his mouth and makes those sounds at the back of his throat with his nasal passage.  I’m not sure when or if he’ll be able to create those sounds.  if it’s a physiological thing or not

with all these illnesses, we have not been to therapies since January…

i’m trying to take everything as it comes and not panic about things that i can’t control – like what will happen when it’s time for Ozzie to go to Preschool or Kindergarten.  I’m trying not to stress over things and stay in the present, but it’s a work in progress.

These days i’m trying to remember to be thankful for my amazing family.  both immediate and extended.  I’m trying to remember to find gratitude.  These days.

on being thankful…

I do this thing on facebook where i issue open letters to places, inanimate objects…the Universe…  it’s kinda my shtick.

The most common one, though, is an open letter to the Universe saying how much it sucks.

These generally fall around the same time that Ozzie is sick, for what i think are obvious reasons.

Today, in fact, i posted one that went along the lines of:

Dear Universe,
You Suck.

shortly after i posted it, i saw an acquaintances status about men who are jerks, and i thought, i’m pretty lucky Brad is so awesome.  Then another one about how much it sucks to be unemployed.  I’m not unemployed

it got me thinking, that i do an awful lot of complaining.  Really.  Things could be a lot worse.

I’m trying really hard, now, to be thankful, instead of angry all the time.
Thankful that i have a loving and engaged husband who does a lions share of the Ozzie related work sometimes, because he accepts that Ozzie is a real Daddy’s Boy.
Sometimes Cedric makes me crazy because he’s always in Ozzie’s face, so i’m trying to be thankful that he loves his brother so much and is not resentful towards him.

I stress out about work – but i’m thankful that i have a job.  I am SO thankful that Brad’s work has made it clear to him that FAMILY comes first, and they have been so respectful of that and so understanding of our situation.

I lost my Sh*t at work on Friday, but i’m Thankful for the kind coworker who hugged me and patted my back until i stopped crying.

I really hate the fact that sometimes we need to insert catheters into our son so that we can clear mucous blockages, but i’m so thankful that someone invented that device, and that a Respiratory Therapist showed us how to do it.

I’m thankful that Ozzie really tolerates, even ENJOYS sometimes, his asthma puffers.
I’m thankful that through some amazing people, some pretty expensive medical equipment found it’s way into our home…for free…

I hate that we have to put Ozzie through numerous medical tests and examinations, but i’m thankful for the technology.  I’m thankful that those doctors/nurses/therapists went to school to became pediatricians, or surgeons, or nurses, or therapists.

I hate that sometimes Ozzie needs oxygen to breathe, but i’m so thankful that someone figured out how to bottle it.

It makes me sad, depressed, and angry that i can’t just go and take my kids and hang out with friends, or run errands, or go to the Fun Factory, or the Play Centre at McDonalds cuz i’m paranoid of germs… but i’m so thankful for those friends who understand, and don’t get upset when i cancel last minute, or who text me several (hundred) times a week, or call me, or email…to see how we’re doing, who talk me off my metaphorical mommy-ledges, who reassure me when i’m feeling crazy, who let me feel normal for 5, 10, 15 minutes at a time…

sometimes, it makes me so crazy that our little family got handed this raw deal, but i’m so thankful that Ozzie chose us to be his family.

It’s not a perfect system, and Lord knows Most of the time it’s easier to just be so goddamned mad at everything all the time, but it’s a work in progress.