it’s hard for me to grasp the concept that Ozzie is a year old now.  My logic brain tells me that, yes – a whole year has gone by, but when i look at him i don’t see it.  I see the same baby… sometimes it seems like he hasn’t changed at all – but then i see photos of him and i’m amazed.  when Cedric was born, he was 4lbs 11 oz.  I thought he was the smallest baby i would ever hold.   Then Ozzie was born, and he was 3lbs 15 oz.  Almost a full pound smaller than Cedric was.

The first few days, going off my past experience with Ceddy in the NICU, i knew better than to ask when Ozzie was coming home.  I figured we’d be gone in a little over 2 weeks, just like Cedric.  But….day after day passed, and i started to wonder… when???

Any mom who’s ever had a baby in NICU knows how hard and stressful that can be, on top of having to go out every two hours and attach yourself to a torture device breast pump in the hopes of maybe squirting out a few mls of liquid gold for your preemie… and it sucks.  and it’s hard and stressful… add to that my 2.5 year old at home who didn’t understand what was happening – who just wanted his mama back…

when we did eventually get him home – after the feeding battle and getting into a fight with a NICU nurse and the Charge Nurse and being moved over to PEDS, we hoped life would get back to normal…

But we jumped right into it – getting his legs casted to correct both his feet, which were clubbed.  He was in the casts for about 6-8 weeks.  He had his tendons lengthened, which involved an incision into both heels, where they CUT!!! his achilles tendon!  IT GROWS BACK!? who knew? Babies are magic.

After the casts came 12 weeks of full time wear of his boots and bar, and now he’s on  half time wear, only at night – for the next 2-3 years…

He was hospitalized in February with RSV and pneumonia, then again in May with bronchialitis, then again in June with a virus, and again in July, and again at the end of August/early September…viruses complicated by teething…. sigh…

He’s rolling over both ways… with and without boots and bar on!  He’s sitting unassisted, although wobbly.  He signs milk and ‘pat’ and sometimes he signs ‘daddy’, although i think he understands more signs than the reciprocates.

He’s behind in his developmental milestones, yes – but i have to remind myself of how far he’s come… how when some babies were playing with their toes and feet, he had his in casts… how when some babies were rolling over, he was in full time boots and bar wear… but look at him now.

Happy birthday little man.  We love you… sometimes its crazy round here, but if i could do it all again, i would – in a heartbeat.